When You've Hit A Motivational Rock Bottom

When life gets you down, go ahead and pour that extra glass of wine, but do NOT let it become a habit. You might have noticed it's been slow around here lately. I wish I could share with you everything that has been going on in life but much of it is too personal to talk about. Mixing your personal and professional life is normally not a good idea but what happens when your personal life is commandeering every facet of your life? How do you manage? This is where that wine comes in.

There are many reasons why I've taken "blog breaks" in the past. School got too crazy, I started a full-time corporate job, I was in-between apartments with no internet. Normal, solid excuses that I didn't have any control over. Most of those were semi-planned blog breaks though. This time, this was not planned. It feels like everything in my personal life just exploded. I am not an emotional person. I don't like handling conflict and sadness and stress. I'm a terrific compartmentalizer and even better at avoidance. However, when life decides to knock you on your ass, there's nothing you can do except face it head on.

As I sit here writing this, wondering if I'm even going to hit publish, I'm listening to thunder rolling in before a storm hits. A thunderstorm is the perfect metaphor for what my life has felt like for the last three months. Unpredictable and chaotic but at times calm. Those calm moments have saved me from calling it quits and there are a few people who are responsible for that. I cannot stress the importance of a support group more than in this moment, even if it's only one or two people. The tumultuous chaos that we call life is sometimes too hard to bare. It feels out of our control and as human beings, we have a compulsive need to do just that. Me more so than others. Losing the fabric of what holds together my strength has been one of the hardest things I've dealt with to date.

I wish I could sit here and say things will go back to normal tomorrow but I can't. I can say with full certainty that this blog is not going anywhere and we will be back to our regularly scheduled programming soon but right now, I need a little patience. 

So, go ahead. If you're having a bad day pour that glass of wine. I have poured probably one too many in the last few weeks. But as someone recently told me, "You are strong and you must continue to pursue success." Those words, as much as they weren't meant to, felt like a slap in the face. We can let the dark moments in our life define us or we could let them make us stronger. I have been so focused on ignoring all of these feelings and fighting the urge to actually deal with everything that has happened in the last few months, it has effected all the plans I had for myself. That is something I am not ok with. Hearing those words put into perspective how out of control I allowed things to get and it's now my time to take life back.

If you're going through a rough patch, whatever it might be, I am telling you right now...YOU are strong and YOU also must continue to pursue success. Life is short. Sometimes too short. Don't waste it by running away during the dark moments. Face them, show them you're stronger and come out of it changed for the better.